Packing Fudge

You know it has not been a good week when the happiest moment of the work week is when you realize at 3 pm you never ate your  fudgesicle from lunch.  At approximately 2:59 pm MDT, Thursday, March 26th, while sitting at my desk, pondering the often asked question of myself, “Am I too old to still be sporting a belly ring?”,  this week altering event hit me like a bug on my scooter headlight.  “Did I eat my dessert at lunch?”  I frowned, looked aimlessly to the ceiling, my head tilted ever so slightly and immediately thought the probabilty of me failing to consume a readily available dessert at its proper eating time holds a less than 1% chance in the world of Brook.  However the chances of me eating a dessert and not even realizing I had finished it because I am too busy doing something meaningless, like checking Facebook or washing my turtles, happens no less then twice a week. It appalls me to count up how many hard working, good tasting desserts fell on my deaf tongue due to my total lack of appreciation and concentration.  I am a buffoon.

I'm Sorry Buddy - It will NEVER happen again.

Well I stood up, briskly walked to the freezer, and opened the door.  To my absolute delight, laying there in its non-descriptive white wrapper,  was my precious fudgesicle.  I gently grabbed the treat, stroked it lovingly, whispered sweet nothing into its chilly exterior: “Don’t worry little buddy, soon it will all be over.”  Then I realized that my odd fondling and hot breath was melting it at a mind boggling pace.  Quickly I unwrapped it, started to consume it, and headed back to my desk.  Unfortunately for me (and the fudgesicle) I am a direct descendant of swine and it was 3/4 of the way finished by the time a reach my destination.  This couldn’t have been more than a 10 – 15 second tops, distance.  I’m pretty pathetic.  Oh yeah, and I just typed 312 words discussing a me and a fudgesicle.  Wow.

On a moderately more exciting note, this Monday is the bowling championships for the Monday Night Football league at the Back Bowl in Eagle. “Ohhhhh, how exciting” you may be saying sarcastically, but to you I say “What exciting thing do you have to look forward to on a Monday?”  Nothing.  That’s what I thought.  Now, back to my bitchin’ story.

So this Monday, our team OP7 will be battling Elite Limo for the esteemed crown of bowling champion.  Many have compared it to with the NCAA Men’s Basketball Championship, but I think that might be a slight strech.  I think it is closer to winning the Super Bowl. Look for us to star in MasterCard commercial with Peyton Manning in the next few months. Or, if you see me or a teammate around town, drop us a Big Lebowski quote.

"I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios mios man."

Let’s roll.

Can You Feel the Madness?

The time has arrived.  I try to fight it, particularly this year since my team only managed to win two, yes two, conference games, but yet I cannot resist its charm.  Ladies and boys, it has been spring-like in the Vail Valley now for eh, let us say, 6 weeks, so not only do I think that that little bastard Punxsutawney the groundhog  should be demoted to a cell with the wall street bafoons, but I am also ready for something that FEELS like spring.  Yes, that would be March Madness.  Like a moderately attractive 20something teacher stalking an underage boy, this little gem happens every year.  I am loving it.

March Madness is the time I throw at least 50 bones away to mediocre brackets and score squares.  It is also the time Dave routinely throws 150 bones away in an auction that in my opinion, might be worse odds than playing KENO.  Every year I get a little edgy with my banker and tell him that for once, would he stop throwing our money away at this terrible concept.  But then, in his sneaky, all knowing ways, he prods me to imagine what would happen if the ONE year he didn’t participate and his group won, how would that make him feel?  Well, last year I was determined to put my foot down and I all but pleaded for him to keep our $150 smackers safely in the bank.  He defied me….jerk.  And then he comes home to tell me they got Kansas.  Frickin’ Jayhawks.   Calm down Jayhawks fans (and I know too many of you), I know you teach your children to say Rock Chalk Jayhawks before they say mommy and daddy and really, who am I to judge?  Cricky, I get tears in my eyes just imagining my little bundle of joy (or misery) making his first “Quack”.  But in recent memories, I have seen your team lose 1st round to Bradley and Bucknell.  Two points to any reader who knows what city and state BOTH of those teams reside in.

Sooooo, what happened?  Memphis decides to put a can over the hoop when they are shooting free throws AND decides not to foul with a 3 point lead and seconds on the clock, only to have the Jayhawks send it into OT and ultimately land some bones in my pocket.  And to think, that could have been the year we didn’t throw our money away…….

Rock Chalk Freaky Miracle

….damn you Dave.

Well, as I am sure you can guess, the next few weeks are full of monitoring games on my computer, highlighters, brackets and endless sports analysis.  Throw in a chocolate donut and a case of beer, and I am just about as happy as I am ever going to be in life.  Ever.

Ohhh, that song from the movie The Girl Next Door is on the radio at work.  If you have never seen the movie, then I suggest you watch it.  Hilarious if you ask me.  And trust me, I am one of those people who don’t really like going to the movies. It is the movie with Elisha Cuthbert, who likes to date hockey guys and who Dave finds to be really dreamy.  Check it out:

Does the curtain match the drapes?

Wow, that was really off subject.  I can’t believe I just posted a hot girl on my blog.  I must really be secure with myself….or just like looking in a mirror (joke……total joke people…I am way hotter than Elisha…..right?).

Well, I must complete my brackets and dream of beer and basketball.  Speaking of, I would like to give a shout out to my big bro, Lance.  Wait this is my blog, so I WILL give a shout to to my big bro.  His basketball team, the Willamette Wolverines, went undefeated in regular season play and won the Oregon 5A Girl’s State Championship a little over a week ago. I was stoked when Fox Sports Northwest (thank god we finally get the Fox Sports channels) actually broadcast the game on tv. Many of the girls are heading to the next level and I couldn’t be happier for him and his team.

Happy Brackets!